Once upon a time there was a hard working, downtrodden assistant Transfusion Practitioner who, appalled at the thought of working for the NHS, with ever-worsening conditions, till she was 97, decided to embark on a new life. She escaped the confines of the broom cupboard she shared with her equally hard working and downtrodden boss and headed off to see the big, wide world.

After sailing across the seas, she arrived in a mythical land of mountains and valleys, vineyards and duck farms. Over the following weeks she had numerous adventures, met lots of frogs and even fell in love with a handsome prince (OK, so I made that bit up!), but as the summer drew to a close, she had to find somewhere to live. A couple of friendly, but undomesticated, wood elves said she could move in with them, on condition that she did the cleaning, the cooking, the washing and all other household tasks except lighting the fires. She agreed to this, little realising the scale of the task she was taking on.

After a number of weeks, bored and fed up with playing the role of domestic goddess (a role she had never excelled at), she found a bucket of magic, reclaimed tiles. Using these as a bargaining tool, she escaped from the kitchen, leaving the wood elves with instructions to make the dinner, and started to tile the hearth in one of the bedrooms. The tiles fitted into place easily and when the hearth was finished……..

Your turn now; please finish the story for me. There may even be a prize for the best!